I could be opening a can of worms here... but I can't help myself.
Many of you know that Michael and I are young. We married at 18, had Levi at 19, and now we're the ripe ole age of 21.
The entirety of our relationship we have been showered with comments like, "Wow! Engaged? Make it a long one!" and "You're getting married already?! That's NUTS!" and (to the news of our pregnancy with Levi) "I can't say it's a good idea..."
Why is young marriage/parenthood so appalling to modern day society? They tell us, "Go to college! Get a job! Buy a house! Travel the world! Follow your dreams! But most of all - make sure you're 85 before you get married and have kids!"
When you see a mom at the grocery store with her children is it cute to say, "Wow! You've got your hands full!" or "Just wait until they are teenagers!" People are so eager to talk about why you shouldn't have children, how you can prevent them, and how they'll never make that mistake. It's as though we believe settling down is going to SUCK THE LIFE RIGHT OUT OF US! Watch out! It's the marriage sucking machine! Pop out a couple gremlins and divorce will be quick to follow!
Really, people?
I was reading an article today and happened upon this quote: "Motherhood is not a hobby, it is a calling. You do not collect children because you find them cuter than stamps. It is not something to do if you can squeeze the time in. It is what God gave you time for."
I find it very unfortunate that so many people view marriage and parenthood as a chore. They are BLESSINGS! They are FUN! They bring JOY and LIFE! Are they for everyone? No! But the next time you see a big family and open your mouth to make a rude comment, try thinking first and realize they might actually enjoy their life!
Many of you know that Michael and I are young. We married at 18, had Levi at 19, and now we're the ripe ole age of 21.
The entirety of our relationship we have been showered with comments like, "Wow! Engaged? Make it a long one!" and "You're getting married already?! That's NUTS!" and (to the news of our pregnancy with Levi) "I can't say it's a good idea..."
Why is young marriage/parenthood so appalling to modern day society? They tell us, "Go to college! Get a job! Buy a house! Travel the world! Follow your dreams! But most of all - make sure you're 85 before you get married and have kids!"
When you see a mom at the grocery store with her children is it cute to say, "Wow! You've got your hands full!" or "Just wait until they are teenagers!" People are so eager to talk about why you shouldn't have children, how you can prevent them, and how they'll never make that mistake. It's as though we believe settling down is going to SUCK THE LIFE RIGHT OUT OF US! Watch out! It's the marriage sucking machine! Pop out a couple gremlins and divorce will be quick to follow!
Really, people?
I was reading an article today and happened upon this quote: "Motherhood is not a hobby, it is a calling. You do not collect children because you find them cuter than stamps. It is not something to do if you can squeeze the time in. It is what God gave you time for."
I find it very unfortunate that so many people view marriage and parenthood as a chore. They are BLESSINGS! They are FUN! They bring JOY and LIFE! Are they for everyone? No! But the next time you see a big family and open your mouth to make a rude comment, try thinking first and realize they might actually enjoy their life!
12 Comments:
Well said.
I couldn't agree more! Imagine all the comments I get when people found out I was 28 with 4 kids, a house, and a husband. I always get "you've got your hands full", but now I've learned to smile and say "actually they're really good kids and it's all under control!" And twins girls...lets not even go there!
People think it is "old school" to cook & clean, get married & to have babies...I think if you can do it looking good,having beautiful babies with a handsome husband & GETTING dinner on the table every night... that's AMAZING...Not to mention when everyone else is 35 and having their first new screaming baby at 2 a.m....I will be sleeping peacefully...hehe...with 2 teenage boys who don't want to get out of bed.
In case anyone wants to read the article Kayla's quoting from, here's the link. :) http://www.desiringgod.org/blog/posts/motherhood-is-a-calling-and-where-your-children-rank
I read it the other day and I agree entirely. WAY TO GO, Kayla!!!! I am with you 100% on this (I mean, I was a 19-year-old bride myself!). I'm SO proud of you for writing this. I am so proud to be a wife and homemaker, and I can't wait to be a mother, of however many children God chooses to give us. Motherhood is SUCH a high calling! Kudos to you for writing this!
Motherhood IS a high calling and way more important then any career or house. You leave your legacy with a child, you don't often times leave your legacy with a career.
Besides, it's God's plan for us to be fruitful and multiply! Now if only society would allow for mom's to stay home with their children. I applaud you if you can! It was never in our budget, so we did what we had to when we had to. I'd still like to stay home....and maybe raise my grandbabies so their mommies can take pictures or paint paintings. ;)
I agree. People seem to also wish their kid's lives away. I can't wait until we get past the diaper stage...I can't wait until they are walking, etc. etc. I try to be careful with that because I know all too soon, I'll be wanting those times back. We waited a LONG time to have kids, but just because we did it that way, doesn't mean that's what's best for everyone. Though i'm not ancient, I've quickly found out that younger parents have more energy to fulfill the motherhood calling, which never hurts! :)
Perfectly put!!! I got so many people trash talking when they found out I was getting married "so young" but I would just say "I'm the lucky one, I just get that much MORE time to spend with my husband." I think if you are sure with your decisions, don't allow society to stand in your way. Some of us were just made to getting married young and have babies. Age alone doesn't make you a better wife or mother.
I completely agree! One of my best friends has 6 children - 2 sets of twins from Invitro b/c they were told they had less than a 5% chance of ever getting pregnant on their own. Then out of the blue when they thought they were done they were blessed with another miracle and a year later another surprise. She loves her children to pieces and knows everyone of them is a miracle. She's always getting snarky comments about how many kids she has and doesn't she know where they come from. She's begun responding with "Yes I do - they're my miracles from God and I thank Him everyday for them " Don't you wish more people felt that way?
You know, I see way too many people waiting until the "right" moment to get married or waiting until they have a house and are financially secure before they finally have their first baby. For some people, that might be the right decision. At least it may seem like it's the most "responsible." But otherwise, I think waiting around can just be wasted time. As for kids, they are such a blessing. Mine make me smile every day. They're the ones I live for. I try to savor every moment because one day they're going to grow up and will probably hate me (or say that they do). There are certainly times of trial with younger children -- as equally trying as when they're adults too though, I'm sure. Even though my #1 child was kind of a surprise, I wouldn't trade him for the world.
very well said
I have found that people have opinions on everything...too bad I don't listen to their opinions :)
I wish I would've had my children younger...keeping up with 2 energetic children would have been much easier in my 20s than it is in my 30s, lol
Children are a precious gift that I see as God has entrusted us with raising/training them, they are His gift to us and so I try to keep that in mind.
Amen, sister!
So glad to know you're enjoying your calling. :D
Love your way with words! We shouldn't ever judge anyone on the personal choices they make, cuz someone is sure to judge us right back! I think big families are great! You know me...I love the Duggars! Thanks for the post!
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